One publishing house is trying to ride the wave of erotic fiction that broke with the overwhelming popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey by producing erotic rewrites of classic literature. Jane Eyre, Sherlock Holmes, Pride and Prejudice, and Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea are just a few tomes that will get the erotic treatment from UK publisher Total-E-Bound. Dubbed “Clandestine Classics“, the publisher writes that in these reworked novels:
“The old fashioned pleasantries and timidity have all been stripped away, quite literally. You didn’t really think that these much loved characters only held hands and pecked cheeks did you? Come with us, as we embark on a breathtaking experience—behind the closed bedroom doors of our favourite, most-beloved British characters. Learn what Sherlock really thought of Watson, what Mr Darcy really wanted to do to Miss Elizabeth Bennet, and unveil the sexy escapades of Mr Rochester and Jane Eyre. We’ll show you the scenes that you always wanted to see but were never allowed. Come on, you know you can’t resist…open the pages and delve inside.”
Hilarious. And, based on the amount of erotic fan fiction I’ve heard about lately, there certainly seems to be a market for this material. The cover at the left is for Eve Sinclair’s reworking of Jane Eyre, entitled Jane Eyre Laid Bare. In the novel, the Guardian reports that “the timid governess is told in no uncertain terms: ‘My penis is hard, Jane. That is what kissing you does to me. My body is filled with desire.’” (HA!) I know that poesy isn’t the goal here, but we’re dealing with classics; couldn’t they find a better wordsmith?!
Are you intrigued to read any “Clandestine Classics”, even if only for a laugh?